Yup. You read correctly. . .I am a grapefruit!
Ahhh. ..the memories of french class of yester year. . the fun we had. . .this was a joke that materialized sometime in those awkward early teen years between my sister and I. . .my recollection of the exact circumstance is somewhat fuzzy and is eluding me, but I suspect it was on a long road trip or something like that. We would often challenge ourselves to converse en francais. . .fun for a while, but then the fighting would begin. . .this insult surfaced when one of us was at the end of our available french vocabulary. . .out of desperation it was blurted out, probably because we didn't know any french curse words. . .grapefruit would have to do. . .what I do remember very clearly is that we ended up bursting into fits of laughter and it became one of those family jokes that we brought up again and again and again. . .(it just kept on getting funnier. .plus there were endless possibilities to insert other various fruits and vegetables into the mix.. .Tu es un pomme de terre etc. )
So naturally when our exchange student from France arrived the other day, it was only a matter of time before the terribly immature grapefruit joke would force it's way out of my mouth. .. it was sitting there in the back of my brain, I could sense it. . .it wanted out. . and bad. I did my best to repress it. . but unfortunately it made it's awkward appearance at the cabin last weekend. . I'll blame it on the sun. . and maybe the G&T I had earlier. . .I'm not sure how it actually went over. .or if Honore (our french guest) was too polite to correct me. . or if his smiling meant he thought I was the wittiest host EVER. . .but I wished I could have taken it back as soon as it came roaring out. . .
This is the thing. .. I've turned into a bumbling idiot? Honore is an awesome guy. . hardworking, great with the kids and he's totally eager to learn English. . .but what he probably didn't anticipate is his hosts equally enthusiastic eagerness to learn french. . .I imagine we are getting pretty annoying while we practice our rusty grade 9 francais out on him. . The worst part is how I transform into a super nerd in the presence of someone who speaks a different language than myself. . .I immediately start speaking poor english, then I start using excessive body language with wide eyed/wild eyed abandon in the hopes that my bulging brown eyes can somehow make my words more understandable???
Grant (because he loves me) gently pulled me aside today and explained that I am talking to our guest like he's 4, plus the sound effects I include in my communication with him might not be necessary! (ie. urrp. .zip. .zing. . click click. . zoink! That's Colleen-speak for how to load the dishwasher. . ) Also, my tendency to unconsciously yell at Honore in the hopes that increased volume will help with the language barrier might not be all that helpful either. . .why am I acting like such a dolt?? I have to find someone fluent in french to come over so I can explain to him that I'm not a total dork. . I'm just acting like one. . .yeah, that makes sense. . .? Or should I say. .zink zink. .burrrr. .ding dong blich?
Other than my weirdness, having Honore in the house and working on the farm has been awesome. . .we love him like family already:)
On a side note. . .if you are wondering how Jillian Michaels Yoga Meltdown workout video is. . .IT'S AMAZING. . I give it two thumbs up. . .I am totally sore today in all the right places:) I blew off my 5 am wake up call AGAIN. . .but am biking to pick the kids up from daycare today. . .so there we go:)
I love the idea in the comments yesterday from Kyla to put a sticky note on the alarm clock that reads "CHOOSE". I'm totally doing that! This is reminding me about this rant from a while back, to choose puts you in a postion of control and power. . .to feel like you "have" to do something is almost like a victim mentality. . .don't be a victim of your expectations. . instead rephrase your whole self talk and choose!!
Onwards and upwards. . .
Oh. . .and if you are interested there is a neat on-line community of women at www.toneitup.com. . .they have fantastic workout videos on youtube and diet tips, recipes. . you name it. . .check it out, I promise you will spend 5 minutes on the site and be inspired:)
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Have known that for a long time Kiddo!
Posted by: Garth | July 21, 2011 at 04:37 PM
Oh lordy you kill me girl...I sooooo do that all the time and my kids LAUGH at me...should I send monsieur Guy over ?? :)
Posted by: Linda Roy | July 21, 2011 at 07:33 PM
Very funny Garth!!!!
. . .and Linda, selfishly I'm so glad to hear you say that:). . .and YES send Guy over!
Posted by: Colleen | July 21, 2011 at 08:11 PM
Wow, I totally busted a gut laughing over this post! Je suis un orange! Look out Honore, here comes the sister!!!
Posted by: Ella | July 21, 2011 at 09:07 PM
He should be afraid. .. very very afraid;)
Je suis un Orange indeed! Man it just doesn't transfer to text very well does it?. .. you totally need the accent and facial expression to bring out the jokes full glory:)
Maybe we should make a video???
Posted by: Colleen | July 21, 2011 at 10:11 PM
Colleen, you are so hilarious! I love that you type how you talk...when I read your posts it's as if you are standing right next to me speaking the words. Love it!
(And I double-LOVE that "choose" idea on your alarm clock...brilliant!)
Posted by: Andrea | July 22, 2011 at 09:41 PM