The Great GORP Project

Playing Hurt. ..

First: Today is the Grand finale of the Dyck Family DIY Gym Bag Project Spectacular. . pics coming tomorrow.

Today is also the day I hope to hear back from Women's Enterprise Center about my loan. . .I've been on pins and needles all weekend. . .this could be it. . .at long last Gorp could launch? What!? Ahhhh. .. I can barely stand the suspense. . .gog.

.  ..but I digress. . back to Playing Hurt. Hmmmm. . .I smell an analogy!

I was very excited to be chosen to review this book by Brian Goins. . .most of the marriage/relationship books I read are by women and we all know men and women are two different species;) Typically when reading books by women my internal dialogue is all like "preach it sista". . ."yeah, you said it!" and "oh, yeah, you caught me. .. I'll work on that, thanks. . " But when reading a man's perspective I found myself going "what the?", "As if?", and "you've got to be kidding!". . .. I think we forget just how different men and women are from each other. .. it's HARD work figuring out how to relate to another person, never mind a different sex!

I have to be honest. . .during the first few chapters there were quite a few sports analogies, which was alright but I did find myself going. .. ahhhhhh really? And I have a high tolerance for anything to do with sport. . .BUT. . .dude brings it round in a big way. He knows his Bible and he also knows HOW GUYS THINK. .. I didn't truly appreciate the motivation behind a guys drive and the reality that much of the time our men are "playing hurt" and we don't even know it until I read this book.

One of the light bulb moments for me was seeing just how important it was for a guy to love his wife like Christ loved the church. . .it's profound. Realizing that YOUR marriage is a way for God to be glorified??!!

"If you say "I do", God is using your marriage to paint a work of art to display His glory to the world. If Satan can exploit your conflict to destroy or dampen your love for your wife, it's as if he just sprayed graffiti all over another one of God's masterpieces."

"Whether we knew it or not, when we got married, we didn't sign up for equal rights, but the right to die to ourselves. We signed up to love like Christ loves. We signed up to beautify our brides. We signed up to take the hits and turn the other cheek."

Even though there are tons of tidbits about how and why a husband should act a certain way. . this is by no means a man bashing "pull up your bootstraps. . you aren't good enough" kind of commentary. Brain digs deep and acknolwedges that it isn't easy to lead. To persevere despite the pain. . .to PLAY HURT. He is a straight shooter on big issues like sex, ego, and he tackles hurts like being disrespected in public by your wife to being talked down to behind closed doors. His candor and honesty is absolutely refreshing.

One of my favourite quotes is from a conversation Brain was having with one of his mentors:

"The number one hallmark of great marriages are spouses who are more aware of the damage done to their mate than the damage done to themselves."

He also likens the trials in a marriage relationship to Paul's relationship with the churches he planted. . .Paul was often hurt, rejected and disrespected by the people he cherished and loved, however he always pursued victory instead of vindication. . ."Scripture highlights emotional pain, rather than hiding it. The men and women we perceive as heroes in the Bible have just as many great foibles as great feats of faith."Our modern culture seems to glorify the exact opposite behaviours, hide your pain, don't show your weaknesses. . .BE A MAN? Yeah right. I'm so sick of the pursuit of macho-ism in our culture. . .it perverts the calling of our men to have integrity and replaces it with a propensity to be dishonest and fake. A recipe for empty.

I love these 5 tips Brain gives in the book: Paul's Playbook for Playing Hurt

1. Every husband needs the GUTS to love like Christ.

2. Every husband needs the GLORY of loving like Christ.

3. Every husband needs OTHER GUYS to help him love like Christ.

4. Every husband needs the GUIDELINES to love like Christ.

    -Nourish

    - Cherish

5. EVERY HUSBAND NEEDS THE GOSPEL THAT EMPOWERS HIM TO LOVE LIKE CHRIST!

 I have to say that despite the sports analogies;) This book reached into my preconceived notions about how men think about relationship and replaced them with a new respect and understanding for the unique calling and challenge God sets out for our men to live out.

 

At the end of it all. .. I found the book enlightening and motivating. . .I love how Brian always comes back to scripture and holds up all the advice and ideals he lays out and measures them against what it says in the Word. Love it!

Check out the blog tour for this book here! As always I was given a free book in exchange for my review. . .so if ya wanna borrow it and live close by just yell:)

. .. ..ahhhhh. .. knees are shaking. . fingers trembling. . I could hardly type today I'm so nervous about hearing back about my loan. .. All I can do is pray LORD YOUR WILL BE DONE. .. but Lord, you should also know that I persevere despite all logic. . .so if you want to send me a message it might have to be rather loud and oh so obvious!

Mugabe And The White African. . ..

 

. . .man, from the Amish to the wilds of Africa. . .I don't know if my heart can take this! I just finished devouring this book by Ben Freeth about his life in Zimbabwe during the horrific land seizure program in 2000. What struck me immediately when I started turning the first few pages was the disbelief that this was happening and I have no memory or knowledge of it being in the press. .. .I feel ashamed that I didn't know more about this. . .

About Mugabe and the White African:

 Ben Freeth has an extraordinary story to tell. Like that of many white farmers, his family's land was "reclaimed" for redistribution by Mugabe's government.

But Ben's family fought back. Appealing to international law, they instigated a suit against Mugabe's government in the SADC, the Southern African equivalent of NATO. The case was deferred time and again while Mugabe's men pulled strings. But after Freeth and his parents-in-law were abducted and beaten within inches of death in 2008, the SADC deemed any further delay to be an obstruction of justice. The case was heard, and was successful on all counts.

But the story doesn't end there. In 2009 the family farm was burned to the ground. The fight for justice in Zimbabwe is far from over--this book is for anyone who wants to see into the heart of one of today's hardest places and how human dignity flourishes even in the most adverse circumstances.

While it was physically painful to read this book. .. (my body literally hurt). . .I was compelled to turn each page. Ben Freeth does an amazing job retelling these almost unbelievable events. The injustice is infuriating, the violence devastating. . .but amidst it all is the unwavering belief in doing what is right. ..ALL THE TIME. . NO MATTER WHAT. . in the face of blatant corruption I could see how it could have been tempting to "let the ends justify the means". . .Ben's belief was that the ends never justify the means if they are wrong! Pure inspiration and a solemn reminder.

This story hit home especially because Grant and I are farmers. . .there is something about land. . about boundaries that have an inherently spiritual aspect. God Himself designed the earth in such a way. . .the separation of land from sea, light from dark. . .form. Land is territory. .. .God blesses it and removes it, He honours promises made on it. . .and He gifts it. . .there is just something about land that is connected to the spiritual realm. . .spiritual territories. . .

The following is a letter that Ben wrote as encouragement to the farmers that were being bullied, brutalized and attacked. . .I think it's a great snap shot illustrating the qualities in the book that make it so valuable. Even though it is extremely hard to read about the events. . .the underlying story of faith, perseverance and trust in God are the jewels!

It is what you believe that will determine how you live your life.

It is what you believe that will determine the society that you live in.

If you do not live out what you believe, your life and the society that you live in will become unacceptable to you.

If you believe in truth, speak it! Live it! Do not compromise.

If you believe in a society without corruption, do not pay out money under corrupt circumstances! Do not compromise.

If you believe in a society without patronage, don't allow yourself to be patronized! Do not compromise.

If you believe in freedom of speech, speak out! Do not compromise.

If you believe in a happy family life, do not chase after other people! Make time for your family. Do not compromise.

If you believe in a community that helps each other, be the first to offer your own help!Do not compromise.

If you believe in God, do everything to seek Him! Don't put Him aside. Do not compromise what you believe.

If you compromise any of these things, the person that you are, and the society that we live in will become compromised.

Wow! Anyone sensing a theme here?! COMPROMISE. Ouch. Guilty. It's the little things that sneak up on you. .. the seemingly harmless inconsistencies in your life that you don't bother to correct because: Who's it hurting??. .. This story puts a spotlight on why it's important to NEVER COMPROMISE your morals. . .it magnifies the consequences of compromise and beautifully shows the rewards for courage and faith in the face of evil.

The PBS debut of Mugabe and the White African, the award-winning documentary of the same name, was on July 26. Watch now at PBS: http://www.pbs.org/pov/mugabe/.

I was given a free copy of this book in exchange for the review. . .if anyone within driving distance of me wants to borrow it just shoot me an email! You can also check out the Blog Tour for this book here if you are interested:)

. . .I'll admit, I can sometimes get bogged down and depressed about the state of the world and find myself "checking out". . .not wanting to hear. .. because (selfishly) it hurts to know. This book inspired me to see the hope in every circumstance. .. .to see that trusting God is ACTIVE and ONGOING. . .it's hard work. . and worth every effort.

Amish Values For Your Family. .. a book review and give away:)

Sorry for the late post. . .yesterday I was in Brandon for a 2 day MRAC board meeting and the internet connection situation in my room was not feeling my chi. . .but here I am, late but enthusiastic:)

Sooooo I'm reviewing Amish Values For Your Family by Suzanne Woods Fisher. . .I stumbled upon this opportunity for bloggers from Litfuse Publicity Group. The deal is, they send out info. about books they are promoting, if you are interested you submit your name and if you get picked they send you the book for free on the condition that you review it on your blog. . . .. super cool. When this title first popped up I thought. .. what the? Amish? Chaaa. . .no. But then I got a little twig/poke/twitch in my gut. .. and I knew for some reason I needed to do this. Boy was I right. ..

The theme of my life this year has been the quest to control the stressy feeling in my brain, brought on by my unrealistic to-do list and rat race tendencies. I've been searching for the recipe for slow, but with a side order of go;) I know deep down there is a way. .it's small choices.  .consistent small choices. .and a paradigm shift. The Amish have something going on. ..they've figured some key things out. . .and I'm sure I don't have to join a colony or don a kerchief to get a piece of Amish peace! Aside from the fact that 95% of Amish businesses DON'T FAIL.  .and the lower disease statistics than our general population. . there is so much more. . .honestly, you'll have to read the book to get the full picture. .. it's a beauty, and the portraits of family life are nothing short of romantic. . .

But for today. . here are some of my favourite Amish proverbs and one of the values from their culture that really resonated with me. ..here we go. ..

We pass on our convictions to our children by the things we tolerate.

The more a child is valued, the better his values will be.

Keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them!

Peace is seeing a sunset and knowing whom to thank.

If God is not first in our thoughts in the morning, he will be last in our thoughts all day.

My job is to take care of the possible and trust God with the impossible.

Instead of putting others in their place, put yourself in their place.

If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished!!

I just love that last one:) One of the pleasant surprises I got from reading about the Amish was discovering the rich sense of humour that seems to be embedded in their way of life which also acts as the lens that they see every situation through. . for some reason it was unexpected and so fun to read about. . .

Amish principle I TOTALLY love:

CHILDREN ARE LOVED BUT NOT ADORED.

Now. .. I've blogged about this principle before right here. Some of you agreed with me.  .others chose not to agree, and some of you sent me emails telling me how wrong I was. . .and I'm o.k. with that. . secretly I LOVE a good rip roaring debate:)

Of course the principle in no way diminishes the value of children in the Amish culture. I actually think it is respectful of them. My opinion is that our "modern" culture is quite disrespectful of children. (don't get me started on the shoe industry . . .stripper shoes for tots is a post for another day. . gag!) I say this because it's quite common to see us parents catering to our kids. . .arranging our lives around them, instead of including them in our lives. .  .(I'm guilty of this. . no pot calling the kettle black in this joint. . ) Does that make sense? Then there is the purpose crisis in our society and in desperation to find purpose we stick our kids into the "purpose for living" shaped hole in our lives and they are stuck not only having to live up to our expectations. . but deal with the immense pressure of reflecting how well we preformed as parents. . .I can't help but think that's why some kids rebel. . .

One of my favourite stories told in the book is of an Amish father who gives his son two rabbits as a gift. They head to the feed store and buy all the supplies to build the rabbit hutch and get to work building. . .it takes them all day. At the end they invite their (non Amish) neighbours over to see the finished result. As the neighbours (Father and son) are admiring their handy-work the father asks why they didn't just buy a rabbit hutch at the hardware store, it would have been cheaper? The Amish man replies that they did consider that option but saw that they weren't built to last so decided to buy the lumber and do it themselves. The neighbour then suggests that they could have bought 2 cheap rabbit hutches and when the first one broke, just pull out the second one. The little neighbour boy looks up at his dad and says "Dad! Maybe we could build a hutch!", his dad replies "We can buy a hutch you mean, no reason to reinvent the wheel."

This is the Amish fathers reply:

"Unless you're trying to teach your son how to use a hammer and saw, unless you want to give your son skills he can use for a lifetime. And you're trying to teach him to build things that last. To take pleasure in his work. Unless you don't mind missing those good talks a father and son have while they're working together side by side. If you don't mind missing those things, then sure, you can just buy the hutch down at the feed store."

What a perfect snapshot of the problems at hand. . .our "disposable" culture of consumption. . and our rushed lives where we often opt to take the fast easy option instead of engage in the slow deliberate but higher value solutions to our problems. I often just "do" things for my kids because it's faster. . I'm often thinking of the next job that needs to be done and consumed with checking things off my to-do list instead of living in each moment and squeezing QUALITY out of each day. The ironic thing is that I stress about teaching my kids these amazing life lessons and wonder how on earth I'm going to do it. . .when really. .. if I just took the time to include them in my daily chores and projects. . .even though it's slower and requires patience. . I'd be accomplishing infinitely more than just the completion of a task.  It's a simple story. . with a simple point. . but so relevant.

Immediately I thought about my to-do list. . I need to buy gym bags for the kids before school starts and I was already planning and musing about where the cheapest place would be to go and get them. It then occurred to me that I own a sewing machine and a gob load of fabric. . .how fun would it be to spend a day with the kids designing and sewing our own customized super cool gym bags? There's measuring, design, co-ordination with scissors, creative thought and the best part. . .the conversations and joking that will inevitably be taking place the whole time. .. . now why didn't I think of that??

. . .thanks Amish Values For Your Family. . .this is just one example and one principle that I eeked out of this book. . .I give it two thumbs up and a big high five. .. maybe with a bit of air guitar thrown in;)

If you want to be the lucky winner of my extra copy. . be the first to email me your address at colleen@gorpworld.com and it's yours:))))

 

Read below for some more opportunities to win the book on the Litfuse blog tour. . .

 

Enter 8/15 - 8/31!

 

Suzanne Woods Fisher is thrilled to announce the release of Amish Values for Your Family, her latest non-fiction release. "It offers loving ways to bring your fractured home back to life-Amish style. Read it and apply generously! It’s a beautiful book-funny, charming, soulful, and beautiful." -Mary Ann Kirkby Read the reviews here.

To celebrate the release of Amish Values for Your Family, Suzanne has teamed up her publisher Revell Books to giveaway a Kindle, and with Bill Coleman (the amazing photographer used on Suzanne’s book covers) to give away a signed Bill Coleman original.

One Grand Prize winner will receive an Amish Values Prize Package (valued at over $200) and includes: * A brand new KINDLE * A Signed Bill Coleman original * Amish Values for Your Family (for KINDLE)

Click on one of the icons to enter. Winner will be announced on 9/2 at Suzanne’s blog. Be sure to stop by the blogs on Suzanne’s blog tour – many have copies of Amish Values for Your Family to give away.

That's it that's all folks. . .I'm off to haul all my "gym bag making glory" out of the storage room!

be mighty. . with a slow go:)

Time to go Amish. . .I'm not joking:)

 
Soooo, a long blogging hiatus once again? It's cause I'm so stinking busy, and it's ticking me off. . .so much so that when I was offered the chance to review this book called "Amish Values For Your Family" I JUMPED at the chance. Why? Cause I'm sick and tired of having the word BUSY come out of my mouth every time someone asks me how I'm doing. .. it's ridiculous, and there has to be a better way. .. strategies on how to live in the NOW. I'm convinced there's a way to be productive without being stressed out. . .so I figured I'd give the Amish my ear for a spell and see what happened!

When crusing around the internet, I found this article from CNN Entitled "Why Amish Businesses Don't Fail" it's a great read. Did you know the Amish have a 95% business success rate?? That's crazy right?! Food based businesses have a 95% failure rate. . .so I figured I better up my knowledge and do some studying under some folks who obviously have some stuff figured out. .. the Amish also have one tenth the rate of depression, lower cancer rates and lower heart disease than the rest of the population. . .hey, the numbers don't lie. . .I'm not too proud to bend an ear. . it's not like I'm going to go around town sporting a head covering and dress anytime soon (I'm way to fond of my frizzy curls and rubber boots) . but I will take some notes;)

I'm almost done the book, and will be sharing my favourite Amish bit of goodness on August 18th.  .until then, here's a bit about the author, and a guest post from her:)

 

Guest blog from Suzanne Woods Fisher for “Amish Values for Your Family” (Revell)

Five More Things I’ve Learned from the Amish that Have Nothing to Do with being Amish and Have Everything to Do with being a Christian:

Live humbly. This is the basis of the Amish life. They don’t waste, they reuse and recycle, they live simply and without luxury, they provide for each other’s needs. Daily life is embroidered with gratitude for all God has given them. Two prayers bookend every meal—a meal begins with thanks to God for the nourishing food, and ends with gratitude for what was received. 

Amish proverb: “The blessing of sharing outweighs the blessing of having.”

The Lesson: Choose simplicity over clutter. Economy over luxury. And give thanks!

A task takes as long as it takes. It seems like such a paradox—the Amish are busy, yet unhurried. They have a deliberateness in their actions—one job isn’t more important than the other. And they don’t have televisions or computers or radios or telephones—which gives them more time to cook, fish at the lake, enjoy a good book, and spend with their children and grandchildren. They have time to slow down a bit—to smell the roses along their path.

Amish proverb: “Every day that dawns brings something to do that can never be done as well again.”

The Lesson: Reduce the time where attention is focused on electronics (computer! Cell phone! Television!) and strive to be more emotionally present when with others.

Success and Size are not related. The Amish have rapidly adopted to the demands of the modern business world. Their self-owned businesses are remarkably successful, but not at the cost of everything else. They view money as a tool, not the goal.

Amish proverb: “Love, peace, and happiness in the home is of infinitely more value than honor, fame and wealth.”

The Lesson: Never let ambition destroy life’s better goals.

They teach us not to seek vengeance but to forgive. The Amish take the Lord’s Prayer seriously—if they are asking God to forgive them their sins, they must be willing to forgive others who have sinned against them. Being a forgiving person is an everyday intention.

Amish proverb: “It is far better to forgive and forget than to resent and remember.”

The Lesson: No doubt you’re familiar with the Nickel Mines tragedy. If the Amish can forgive the killer of their children, can’t we forgive a friend for not inviting us to a party? Or a driver who cuts us off? Make forgiveness your default button. A habit. An everyday intention.
 

God has a plan. To the Amish, everything passes through the hands of God. Everything. Joys and sorrows, both. God is sovereign over all—from weather to illness to births to who’s in the White House. They yield to God’s perfect will, trust Him for what they don’t understand, and thank Him for what they do.

Amish proverb: “God’s hand that holds the ocean’s depth can hold my small affairs. His hand, which guides the universe, can carry all my cares.”

The Lesson: Trusting God isn’t passive—it takes a lot of work! But what peace and joy are available to us when we put our faith in the Almighty God. Everything, ultimately, works out for good.

Suzanne Woods Fisher is a bestselling author of Amish fiction and non-fiction and the host of a weekly radio program called Amish Wisdom. Her most recent book, Amish Values for Your Family released in August. The Waiting is a finalist for a 2011 Christy Award. Amish Peace: Simple and Amish Proverbs were both finalists for the ECPA Book of the Year (2010, 2011). Her interest in the Amish began with her grandfather, W.D. Benedict, who was raised Plain. Suzanne has a great admiration for the Plain people and believes they provide wonderful examples to the world.  When Suzanne isn't writing or bragging to her friends about her first new grandbaby (!), she is raising puppies for Guide Dogs for the Blind. To Suzanne's way of thinking, you just can't take life too seriously when a puppy is tearing through your house with someone's underwear in its mouth.

I just love the book so far. . .it's just what I needed coming into fall. . .time to set new priorities, establish some healthier schedules, and link in with God on a daily basis. . .I'm getting inspired to go slow, but go with intent, go with purpose and go groom some down home values into 4 lovely kids who desperately need me to take some quality time with them. . .

Whoop:)

Now go be mighty!

 

Mugabe and the White African. . .

One family’s stand for Justice – catch the story on PBS 7/26!

I'll be blogging about the book Mugabe and the White African later this month, but I wanted to let you know that Point of View will air the documentary Mugabe and the White African on Tuesday, July 26th. The film tells the story of Mike Campbell and his family of three generations of Zimbabwean farmers as they attempt to keep their farm under Mugabe's "land reform." Watch the trailer for the documentary below and visit the PBS Point of View website for your local listing. http://www.pbs.org/pov/tvschedule/

This documentary was shortlisted for an Oscar last year and is supposed to be excellent!

. . stay tuned. .  tomorrow. . .pictures of the MASTER ANGLER BASS I caught on the weekend. . .for reals!

 

The book Mugabe and the White African (Lion Books, distributed by Kregel Publications, July 15, 2011, ISBN: 978-0-7459-5546-9, $14.95) written by Mike Campbell's son-in-law Ben Freeth provides more detail regarding the family's struggles and court battles.The book chronicles the deeply moving and life-threatening struggle of a Christian family from Zimbabwe to protect their legally owned farmland, to protect the lives and livelihoods of all those working on the farm, and to live to see justice.

Freeth lays bare a beautiful but lawless land fouled by fear. A 'Clockwork Orange' state where racism, greed, and violence are ultimately humbled by almost unimaginable courage. Richly described, bravely chronicled, and utterly compelling. 

-Mike Thomson, Radio Foreign Affairs Correspondent, BBC

Ben Freeth has an extraordinary story to tell. Like that of many white farmers, his family's land was "reclaimed" for redistribution by Mugabe's government. But Ben's family fought back. Appealing to international law, they instigated a suit against Mugabe's government in the SADC, the Southern African equivalent of NATO. The case was deferred time and again while Mugabe's men pulled strings. But after Freeth and his parents-in-law were abducted and beaten within inches of death in 2008, the SADC deemed any further delay to be an obstruction of justice. The case was heard, and was successful on all counts. But the story doesn't end there. In 2009 the family farm was burned to the ground. The fight for justice in Zimbabwe is far from over--this book is for anyone who wants to see into the heart of one of today's hardest places and how human dignity flourishes even in the most adverse circumstances. Read an Excerpt (PDF) Read the Press Release